Why do people scoop awards? I don't mean that, what I mean is, they don't scoop them, so why do people say that they do? They say that all the time, don't they? But it doesn't happen. Anyway, I read that that David Sushi scooped an award for best acting on a film with acting or on a telly programme with acting, I forget which. But I bet there was no scooping involved. He probably got up there and did a little speech, thanking his mother and his agent, and all his fans who make sure people don't get his name wrong: it's not David Suchard, like the chocolate, it's not David Sachet, like a little paper bag of salt, it's David Sushi, as in rice. Anyway, no scooping. Why do they say that? Perhaps originally they used it when someone won a lot of awards, trying to paint a picture of them putting their arm around five awards they've won, all lined up on the rostrum, and scooping them into a carrier bag, to take home on the tube, if it's in London, or the limo, if it's Hollywood. I don't think you get awards anywhere else, do you? Unless it's like... do they speak of people 'scooping' concrete industry awards and the like? They probably do, in the trade rags. Anyway, it wouldn't happen, they don't get given awards for different categories at the same time. They'd be getting up to get each one separately, doing a little speech, and then taking them back to their tables - because that's what they do, don't they? They sit at round tables. The actor, or whatever, and about five henchmen. Maybe including the producer or something. Anyway, they'd take each one back to their tables, leave it there or pop it in their bag. Then sit there until they get called up for another. They can't stay up the first time and say "I'll just hang about here in case I get another one, save me going back to my table". What if they all did that? Imagine the crowd up there! What they might do, is, because there's all this talk of scooping awards, that might make them leave them all on the table, just so at the end they can scoop them into their bag, thinking 'heh, I'm scooping my awards'. But the talk came first, it's nonsense. And anyway - my point was, is, you don't scoop a single award.
Libya, Yemen, Bahrain... with all that distraction, thank goodness the BBC still has space to report the really important stories. This story is so humbling that I'm just going to read it out without comment and leave it there. It almost redefines what news is:
Tesco garage petrol sign targeted by pranksters
Eagle-eyed motorists were in for a surprise when pranksters tampered with a petrol station price sign.
The 24-hour Tesco garage in Fleetsbridge, Poole, Dorset, was targeted on Sunday morning.
The unleaded petrol price was changed to 25.9 pence per litre and the letters LOL - which normally stand for Laugh Out Loud - were written below it.
The normal price of unleaded petrol at the station is 125.9 pence per litre. Tesco said it had corrected the sign.
A spokesman said: "Staff corrected the sign as soon as they were alerted to the prank."
The spokesman said it was spotted on Sunday morning and no permanent damage had been caused.
Jimmy Skillings, who spotted the prank and took a photograph, said: "I know petrol prices are a joke but this is funny
"Whoever did it sure has a sense of humour."
that's all from me for now
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