One day It Is What It Is may say nothing. Do not be alarmed, it is nothing to fear. It will be almost business as usual, it's just that it won't be saying anything. There will be no need to paint your windows white and build a staircase with a cupboard you can hide in underneath.
You will not need to listen for the all-clear siren. It will not be necessary to boil your water unless you hear a separate announcement.
You will not even have to unplug your video, unless you're taking it through to the bedroom. If you're taking your video through to your bedroom to watch for instance Beverley Hills Cop, you can go right ahead, even though It Is What It Is isn't saying anything. It will be completely unnecessary to remove your light bulbs from their sockets, unless they need changing anyway, for there will be no massive power surge or anything like that. Neither will power cuts ensue, or flash flooding or flash fires or flash photography, nor will martial law be declared, there will be no haunting footage of a terrified-looking screaming woman, despite the fact that It Is What It Is isn't saying anything.
It Is What It Is is designed according to the principles of Style-Substance Harmonology, and built-in checks and balances ensure that it can run smoothly for short periods even when it isn't saying anything. Each time It Is What It Is contains an interesting idea, thought or story badly expressed, the differential potential charge across two points charges a prosaic flywheel, building up a reservoir of writing which releases when the pressure difference is reversed, for instance when the content falls to zero. The upshot is that there will be no cause for concern, standard programming will be maintained, all your favourites will still be on when It Is What It Is isn't saying anything. You will not have to get into the brace position or the recovery position or the pole position. You will not need to take your teeth out or let the air out of your tyres. You won't have to barricade yourself in your kitchen nor bring the cat in, nor turn out the lights and pretend no-one's home, it will be no more dangerous than usual to answer the telephone, there will be no unusual outbreaks of rioting and looting anywhere in town, you won't even have to turn the volume down, the sun will still rise and set in the usual way, even if it's a bank holiday even though It Is What It Is isn't saying anything at all, you have no need to fear that day because that day was today.
that's all from me for now
see you around
Noodles In A Tub Of The Day: Acecook