I don't know how you feel about flies. There's a good chance you're not too keen on them, fair enough. I have to say I'm not a big fan of flies either. They're very good at what they do, no doubt about that, and I'm sure you'd acknowledge that too. Fair's fair, to do otherwise would be petty. I just don't really want them in my life, when they are in my life, or my house, I resent it, frankly I see it as an encroachment. Yes, an encroachment. That's what I said. I'm sure it's the same for you. The feelings, that is, I'm not saying you just said encroachment. Anyway, we wouldn't wish any unnecessary suffering upon the little critters. So you will be as flabbergasted as I by the news from a few months ago that science has figured out how to give flies bad memories of stuff that didn't happen.
Never mind how, but why and what - I mean, why would you want to make a fly think that it had been married to Sarah Palin? Or been to every concert on Shakin' Stevens' Merry Christmas Everyone tour? Is it that these scientists dislike flies, perhaps no worse than we do, but they're nasty pieces of work, with a nasty value base, and they think it's a perfectly natural thing to want to do, in fact they'd do the same to us if they disliked us?
I have to wonder about some of my own bad memories now. Did those things really happen? Did I really experience them? Or did I just meet some evil scientist at a party, and he found me a bit annoying? I have to wonder now, was there any such person as Margaret Thatcher in reality? Perhaps there never was a television series called Heartbeat. Perhaps the slot I believe it occupied in the ITV schedules was actually occupied by some other Nick Berry vehicle with slightly more artistic merit. And did I really have a bit of a saga, partly caused by mine own terrible Keirness, on Wednesday getting the bus? I know I posted photographic evidence online (not here, elsewhere, I do live other places on the internet you know - those of you who come here from such places, don't look at me like that - I know you come from there, but this isn't written purely for you as an individual, as misleading as the intimate style is)... anyway, I know I posted photographic evidence of the travel trek online, but I might just think I did. These darn evil scientists. Actually I think I'm probably pretty safe - for now. If they announced the fly thing a few months ago they're probably working it up to being able to do it on people they're jealous of and stuff. You may think that maybe they did the fly thing ages ago and they're announcing it now to mislead us into thinking that they're less advanced than they are. But they're not psychologically capable of that, these evil scientists. They couldn't leave it that long without boasting.
So, I really did spend six hours watching the first part of Britain's Top Hundred Games Show Hosts. Damn.
that's all from me for now
see you around
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