Hello again iiwiiers
I've just written something for something else, so I'm going to give you that, It will make a change. Back to the usual rubbish tomorrow, but here's some slightly different rubbish.
Hello again readers. We're just over the peak of the winter and I'm in a negative mood. So what am I going to write about? I had plenty of ideas, but I didn't fancy any of them in the end. Here's a list of some of the things I decided not to write about. The things I've been going on about recently (sick of them). What it's like to be dead but not really (too weird and heavy). Some random things (too much like what I'm always writing). My unreliability (too much like the subject I had last time, my disorganisation). So I decided to get all personal, like. I hope you don't mind. This isn't really my kind of thing at all, you see, it's sort of a last resort. A dusty get out of jail free card stuck to the bottom of my bag of tricks. But today I feel that all the other tricks would make a rubbish column, at least for Hello Cruel World. I'm less fussy about It Is What It Is, my daily write, but that's a different, more sloppy kind of thing, it's only on the internet and has a smaller readership than this. But I should really be getting on with this, the word count is slipping away from me while I'm prevaricating.
Image via Wikipedia
I have a delicate relationship with the outside world. I find it rather interesting, in small doses. Especially the people. People are extraordinary. I can get by rather like you can get by abroad if you have a phrasebook level knowledge of their language. It's different with some people who know me quite well, I am sort of more myself with them in a way, I think, but I'm not sure. I don't always think I know myself very well, and sometimes I envy people who I think must have a better handle on me than I have on myself. I can't really see the wood for the trees. It's been that way for as long as I can remember. I always had trouble answering those 'what's wrong with you' questionnaires, as for so many questions the honest answer would have been 'yes and no, depends exactly what you mean, and I'm not sure which is the real me anyway'. And they never let you put that. For instance, am I am extrovert? Or am I an introvert who is compensating? I've never really known the answer to that sort of thing, and it was all I could do to stop thinking about things like that. But that just adds to the general vague problem vagueness - I just don't know what's wrong with me.
I feel like an alien in some ways. In the way I view you lot, for instance. We don't really understand each other, and we're not really the same, but I'm quite fond of you all the same. Sometimes one of you passes quite close in your spaceship to my spaceship and we have radio contact for a few minutes and this for me is a powerful moment, and as we part I wave you on your way with my hanky and a tear in my eye. But I am happy to do so, for it's at such moments that I really feel truly alive, and I couldn't share a longer time with any of you, I would grow less fond of your silly Earthling ways and start to share my thoughts on exactly what the ten worst things are about the person you are. I've strayed too far from reality there. This is supposed to be personal, not fantastical. But it's hard to reveal what I don't know! Actually, it isn't, is it? We can meet people and get some insight into them which they lack themselves very quickly indeed. But is it correct? That's the thing. Any of us can get the wrong idea about any of us. I don't help with my self-ruminations, if any of you have any wrong ideas about me it's probably because of something I've said. Possibly even in this Hello Cruel World. I can't honestly swear that much of the above is true.
So, where does that leave us? It leaves us with a load of words about not much (it's not really a lot of words, but it's even less content). I should a) try to cram in some more things about me before the end and b) promise you that the next one won't be about me so much. Okay, I am writing this on something called 'Write Or Die' which helps me by hassling me if I stop. It's working quite well for me. I'm now however a bit paralyzed by the rapidly declining word count. Eight hundred and fifty words I was asked
that's all from me for now
see you around
Chocolate Of The Day: Marathon