I bought some Chilli Coated Peanuts today. 'Deliciously Hot.' Well they were a little hotter than I'd have liked them, but anyway. I was drawn to their guarantee on the back. It said 'this product should reach you in perfect condition. However, should it fail to satisfy, please send the complete pack to the address below, stating when and where purchased, and the reason for dissatisfaction. We will be pleased to reimbursed you.' I was sorely tempted to do so, saying something along the lines of 'after eating them I had a strangely hollow feeling - how could they satisfy me when there is so much suffering in the world?' But they're not made by some huge mega-company, so I thought I'd better save that for such a body, who have a whole department to deal with that sort of frippery, rather than a smaller firm whom I would probably destroy by sending the owner off sick for months.
Ned Lamont won and Joe Lieberman lost in Connecticut - so that's that - a bit of an anti-climax, although it was what I wanted. It's just that the fact that he looked like he was going to win was a lot more interesting that the fact that he won now is.
I forgot to post this last night - what a clot! I'll post it now instead. But not before telling you the two startling last things I had to tell you. Firstly I'm away until Saturday so you probably won't get anything. Good job I forgot this last night, eh? It'll make the chasm less painful for you. But astonishingly yesterday there was one roll left in the co-op, and it was the fabled bacon, sausage and egg. It was nice enough, but obviously not worth the wait. There wasn't even a golden ticket!
See you around
Butterfly Of The Day: Chalk-hill Blue
Posted by Keir Hardie at 11:14 am
All the shenanigans with The Bag (no hyperlink there today, that's how much confidence I have in your technical abilities) yesterday meant I missed a few things I had to tell you, and weirdly I remember two of them. Firstly I wonder if our Starbuck is short-staffed, or what. There wasn't a huge queue yesterday, but I had to have my coffee in a paper cup, as they had no big mugs left. When I went round the corner and found a free table there were four of them on it. They were still there went I left. That's not technically true, but it is essentially true as if I hadn't been taking so much time to drink my coffee they would have been. Secondly I see that foreign secretary Margaret Beckett is dealing with the crisis in Lebanon heroically by going caravanning in France. Apparently she'll come back if you need to. Two good links for the situation - Ceasefire Campaign (thanks Anne) and George Monbiot's great piece from today's Guardian - if you're paranoid or suspicious or something you can look at it with all the sources cited on monbiot.com. I also see an interesting piece by Jimmy Carter that I didn't see earlier. The Connecticut Democrat primary result must be out soon I think - it really seems to have got people going, I read that 11,000 unafilliated voters in Connecticut have registered as Democrats since May. That's pretty impressive by any standards.
See you around
Shit Old Drink Of The Day: Tab
Posted by Keir Hardie at 9:55 pm
Just been to the chippy again - and noticed a different aspect of The Bag that I had not considered before - the use of the phrase 'the original and the best' (or THE ORIGINAL and THE BEST to be more precise). It is a puzzling phrase. Could it mean 'our fish and chips are the original fish and chips and other people's fish and chips are tawdry wannabes'? It is a generic bag, no doubt sold across the nation to a whole host of chip shops, so I think we must discount that possibility as ludicrous. So we must assume that it's referring to fish and chips generally. But the original and the best what? Perhaps we can admit evidence from the wider cultural context - some of the other publicity material used by chip shops over the years has been of the 'forget those new fangled pizzas, curries, baked potatoes and stuff! what you really want is what you've always had! a nice chippy! you don't want to broaden your horizons and eat something else sometimes!' kind, so perhaps it means the original and the best takeaway. I think this is the most likely explaination, although the way it is laid out as THE ORIGINAL and THE BEST does leave the possibility that it is suggesting something like the fish is original and the chips are the best, but I think this is less likely. I think we should consider the matter resolved to our satisfaction pending any further information or thoughts.
Perhaps tomorrow we'll have the results of the Connecticut Democrat primary, which is exciting, but perhaps it will be the day after. I never know what it means when a paper here in the UK refers to tomorrow in another part of the world.
See you around
Car Of The Day: Vauxhall Ventora
Posted by Keir Hardie at 9:31 pm
Apparently they've found a new tomb in the Valley of the Kings, maybe. With radar. It seems that the main benefit of the discovery is for political manouvering - the site is full of quotes like "‘KV64’ must be the platform from which to insist that any and all future investigations in the Valley of the Kings are approached with immense caution and carried out methodically to a larger plan by well-funded, professional archaeologists sensitive to all of the site’s possibilities and needs" - apparently they weren't happy with the careless way KV63 was done: "All offers and proposals went unanswered, however, as the American team determined to go it alone." Sounds familiar... (no offence American readers). I also read that the 'life on Mars' meteorite has been rejected after ten years - quite right, I hardly think a meteorite would make a copper go back in time to the seventies and all that. I'm surpised it stayed on the storyboard for that long. My recommendation is that they pick aliens. Or like a Quantum Leap thing, whatever that was. Perhaps he can do another timeshift every few series. Go and prevent Heartbeat.
I'm going to have salmon goujons with chips for me tea. There's only ten degrees difference between the instructed cooking temperature, that's like one gas mark, i reckon i can get away with it. I am so fiendish. It'd be twenty if i was having a pie, but i'm having salmon goujons, so it's all okay. I wonder what a goujon is. Wikipedia doesn't know. But now I do, so I'm better than wikipedia. It's a small, fried strip of fish. I could cut each one into tiny strips and invent the goujonette. These particular goujons are coated in the usual breadcrumb/garlic/herb shit, and are perfect as a starter or for entertaining. I'm doing neither of those, but I must admit the latter suggestion intrigues me. Why are they perfect for entertaining? Will they laugh at absolutely anything?
See you around
Powder Of The Day: Sherbert
Posted by Keir Hardie at 9:41 pm